Matt'sUniverse

Some people have been telling me that I talk less now compared to before I left NZ.
I guess in some way I have been talking less.

I don't really like talking, I talk too make people feel at ease, only with people I trust I dun talk so much because then I can show them my true self cuz when I talk I dun feel like my self at all, its like the objective of my talking is to not sincere but rather to change the atmosphere. I hate that, covering up something to do something else. People who I feel do that to me I just can't be my self around them.

Beside, my type of conversation doesn't interest many people which makes me kinda lonely, I love to talk about basketball but apparently not many do, so I can't really talk with many people, sigh...
I like final fantasy but yet again many people dun even know what that is. I also like sports but apparently nobody has all these same interest. Sometimes i might think that the problem might be me or rather how I converse information, I'm a blunt and direct person , say what I think, never giving it a second thought until after I have say it, have a problem being sensitive to women needs, love sarcasms. I did try to force my self to love football so I can communicate with family and friends but I just can't. sigh, I like a quiet atmosphere.

Also, sometimes when you meet some1, after saying 'Hi', 'how are you' etc etc, what are you gonna say next, you dun know what he likes, damn, in movies, this kind of situation just fades away but in reality you have to deal with it and there's no escape. you need to have good people skill I guess which sometimes I think is just not sincere. sigh, too many over lapping facts, you have to be so careful in this world until you just don't want to care anymore.

The only think that would help me now is to focus and study hard, when the time come, I shall deal with it because no 1 human being can solve all the problems.